J. phoned. He enjoys forcing me to pretend that he hasn't wound me up.
J:- You're in trouble.
C:- I'm always in trouble.
J:- You're a bad feminist.
C:- No doubt.
J:- I just read. You're insulting women. Flashpoint isn't sexist.
C:- I'm sure I did. Even if I didn't.
J:- There's Flashpoint women who're strong women.
C:- Good for them!
J:- You're a bad man. You've insulted women.
C:- Oh ....
J:- Sexist!
C:- Because?
J:- Because Flashpoint's got strong role models.
C:- In Flashpoint? But ..
J:- Sexist!
C:- (Tired and rising stupidly to the bait.) Right. So the overall bias of 'Flashpoint', the structural relations of the female characters to the male ones, and their representations in terms of the male and not the female gaze, is all utterly transformed for the good because Iris West is a war reporter?
J:- You've read it then?
C:- I've read 'Flashpoint'.
J:- Not Flashpoint. The evidence against you. The stuff that's been written?
C:- No. (Beat. Unconvincingly;) Of course not. I don't get upset by ...
J:- Sexist!
C:- Whatever.
J:- And that "Splendid Wife" stuff?
C:- Let me guess.
J:- Gill's not your wife. She's a person.
C:- Well, of course she is.
J:- It's up to her.
C:- What is?
J: - Whether she's splendid or not.
C:- Oh, come ...
J:- Sexist!
 |
| An Idiot Husband, The Splendid Wife & Alf The Wonder Dog (R.I.P.) |
So, for J., and at the end of the evening of Gill and I's Eighth Wedding Anniversary, which has been fine, can I just clarify? Gill isn't a bit player in my life, of course she's not. Rather, I am a supporting character in hers, and glad to be so too. If she's the Splendid Wife, it's because I'm the Idiot Husband. If our life was a comic book, she'd be the headline character, and I'd play the domestic support, the comic relief, the bumbling sidekick, and I'd feel privileged to contribute whatever I could too, just as I do out here in the real world. The Splendid Wife is splendid because she's smarter than I am, kinder than I am, stronger than I am, and endlessly more practical and creative.
If I'm sympathetic to the broad myths of matriarchy, perhaps it's in part because I'm a citizen of a profoundly beneficent matriarchy myself.
And so, after 2922 days or so of marriage, perhaps I might just salute the Splendid Wife, who not only saved my life, but made it worth the living too.
True story. Real life. Straight from the mouth of the Idiot Husband.
.
Does J = Johns?
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on the anniversary. A Splendid Wife, a Loyal Doggie and a Well-Thought of Blog About Comics - it is not quite as iconic as the answer Conan gives to the question "What is best in life?" but it is a superior one ;)
Hello Emperor:- You're right! Those 3 qualities do beat the likes of the lamenting of the families of the warriors I've crushed as markers of a life worth living :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for the generous words! There must a amateur sit-com about a blogger so self-involved that he thinks that everyone around him is secretly a comicbook creator, and that everything they say has a meaning in terms of comics chit-chat. Oh, Geoff Johns has just called / No, that was John from number 3 ...
But now I think about it, it almost sounds like a steal from the set-up of Moon Knight # 1 ....
If you've attracted opprobrium from both feminists and critics of feminism, then that probably suggests you're doing something right. Many feminist accounts of the world contain a lesser or greater degree of truth, the real controversy arises when you try to establish what (if anything!) should be done to rectify the situation. If all you've done is say 'there's something in a comic that might be worth thinking critically about', then it's not like you deserve to be stuffed in the fridge alongside Alex DeWitt.
ReplyDeleteLike you, I never cease to be amazed and grateful that a spouse with many fine and unique qualities has deigned to be married to me. Long may our Wives be Splendid, and long may we tell them they are!
Alex S
Good luck hearing the lamentations of their women - this is comics fandom we're talking about.
ReplyDeleteCongratulations to you and the Splendid Wife, Colin!
Hello Alex:- May I wish your wife - your Splendid Wife - all the best! Important business first! The good fortune which it seems has blown our way mustn't be disrespected, a comment made with in jest with not an ounce of anything other than seriousness in it.
ReplyDeleteMy feminism - and I make no claims for it being the true Church :) - is informed by my decades of teaching, and by the fact that every year I was teaching young women who clearly weren't being treated fairly and who often weren't going to be either. So, I guess my feminism is no more or less than a belief that cultures should organise themselves around the DEBATE about what fairness is rather than how ADVANTAGE should be perpetuated. Beyond that, I've nothing but a loathing of bullies to inform me. I just hate seeing folks being picked on, a naive and stupid-sounding principle to underscore action, but there are worse ones to hold.
Bless you for freeing me from the fridge-stuffing fate! I suppose that there's something to be said for inadvertently contributing in a tiny, totally minor and unimportant way to stirring up a lil'debate. It doesn't matter what my point/s were, if they carved out a few net-minutes when a few folks talked about these things again, then HUZZAH! And I can think of 6 things - I have a list! - that I did poorly in the original article that I hope I can avoid next time too! A win-win situation.
Hello Mr Brigonos:- once again you have me laughing out loud. Seriously. "Good luck hearing the lamentations of their women - this is comics fandom we're talking about." Top man!
ReplyDelete"Congratulations to you and the Splendid Wife, Colin!"
That's a generous thing to say and it's gratefully received. I shall pass on your wishes.
I hope that your capacity to draw is returning and that the day is going well for you. By chance, I was thinking of thee while reading over lunch an advert Marvel had placed full of good reviews for the new Spider-Man books. "The Critics Have Spoken!" it trumpeted, but all I could think was "You wait till Mr B gets to speak about Peter %!*£ Parker!"
I wouldn't lose any sleep over anyone who tries to pull your feminist card for ranting against Flashpoint.
ReplyDelete1. The big two are still such a straight white boy's club (not made up for by the presence of notable exceptions working within them or the occasional storyline that breaks from this mold).
2. Ape controlled Africa? All of Africa? Bigger than China+the US+more Africa?
3. Since when is endless kavetching about comics not ok? Oh yes, when it centers on male privilege, class privilege, racial privilege. Cuz that's not what comics are about (Just like there's nothing Marvel can do about not having enough superheroes of color to fill out an avengers team).
Recently stumbled on your blog and, have to say, some of my favorite writing on comics. Keep up the good fight.
Hello Robin:- thank you for your generous words, which are much appreciated.
ReplyDelete"Since when is endless kavetching about comics not ok? Oh yes, when it centers on male privilege, class privilege, racial privilege."
Robin, I'm printing that out and putting it on the board behind the 'puter. Seriously. It really does hit the spot. There's a strange conservatism about SOME comic book fans, to say the least.
You are of course right to say that the Big Two do seem very oddly stuck in a particular mind-set where the majority of their output is concerned. Notable exceptions do exist, of course, as you rightly say. I picked up the new Alpha Flight today and it's very much a book that takes a broader view of things. An unexpected pleasure, to say the least. I wouldn't say it was a great comic book, but it was a solid, entertaining and decent one. More would be good ..
The Ape controlled Africa business ... is just beyond belief. I mean, actually beyond belief. That no-one said ARE YOU SURE, or no-one listened, is ... well, beyond belief ...
If I was Marvel, I'd sit down and ask everyone what could possibly be lost by a Black Avengers mini at the least. I can't see how it would loose. It would sell. (There's no way it wouldn't break even, and I suspect a great deal more could be achieved.) Great press, access to new audiences, a chance to establish that critics of the company's policy's aren't inclusive enough. Where exactly would the downside be from a corporate point of view?
I think CREDIBILITY + MONEY + MEDIA = MAKE IT SO! But I suppose I've missed the point ... whatever the £*!" that might be!
Thanks for the kind words. You're very welcome over this way, I assure you.
Ah, belated Happy Anniversar to you and Gill- looking at that picture, it's obvious you're a wonderful match. Complementary rather than in competition.
ReplyDeleteHello Martin:- thank you for your kind wishes. We are indeed complimentary rather than in competition, opposites in most every fashion. In fact, by ever indicator, we shouldn't be able to keep a relationship going, let alone stay together for 14 years. The survey data used to match couples in the more reputable dating agencies would never make a match between the two of us.
ReplyDeleteStrange world, but unexpectedly kind at times ..
Dan Slott writes an entertaining Spider-Man, Colin, and I don't have to like the character to be able to admit as much.
ReplyDeleteOn a tangent related to your Moon Knight post, Slott has also taken the Phil Urich/Green Goblin/Hobgoblin character from Loners - one of my all-time fave comics, you will recall - and made him a current Spidey villain, so if you're still looking at comic portrayals of DID/MPD, it might be worth a gander on that basis.
Mr B, I think that's a special compliment, actually, given your feelings re: Parker-boy. I'm glad that I followed Mory's advice and ordered that recent issue.
ReplyDeleteThat whole urich/goblin/hobgoblin thang occurred while I laying off the Marvel Comics. It all seemed terribly complicated whenever I dropped in and saw it being played out. But that does give me another 'in' re: Mr Slott's Spider-Man. Thank you for the advice.
I am heading over to E-Bay now. If there are issues of the Loners available at a reasonably cheap price, I am buying them NOW. The time has come to stop prevaricating. I must be able to get a good 15 000 words out of them, ah?
Mr Brigonos:- I have just invested £7.05 in the TPB of Loners from Amazon.co.uk. £7.05 that I surely don't have.
ReplyDeleteThis had better be as bad I hope it's going to be. (Rating of 1 star on Amazon. Out of just one review, mind you, but I didn't expect a representative sample of opinion.)
It is good to know that you dance to my mad fancies, Colin. This must be what God feels like.
ReplyDeleteHe really should get out more.
In fairness to it, I do recall being much more nonplussed by Marville and Batman: City of Crime (fellow recommendations at the time) than Loners, which - while admittedly also not good - I described less in terms of bad and more in lacking in creative merit(1).
But while I felt it redundant as a comic, alongside recent Darkhawk offerings(2) it does continue the portrayal of mentally ill comics characters across multiple pairs of writing hands. That's one for the merit column, surely?
(1) Subjective, I grant you, but I think fair.
(2) SEVEN BLOODY QUID(3)? To avoid future guilt I'm saying this now - do not buy War of Kings (which comes after Loners) or Runaways: True Believers (which precedes Loners). I have copies with your name on them should you be so inclined.
(3) It's the extra 5 pence that gets me, for some reason. Like insult to injury.
Hello Brigonos:- I dance the fandango to your mad fancies, Mr B, and I fully accept how that can look when taken out of con text, because it's true.
ReplyDeleteMarville and BCOC are to be read too. I'm dancing!
Am I reading you right that you're NOT a fan of War of Kings and True Believers, or is this reverse psychology?
That 5p is a bloody cheek, isn't it. But I suppose that the expectation is that folks who'll buy the Loners will pay an excessive extra 5p too.
My best to you, Mr B.
No reverse psychology here, Colin, I only mention what comes before and after Loners and how you should not buy them when spare copies are for the having.
ReplyDeleteI had no issues with War of Kings (a crossover from the Marvel cosmic line), and Runaways True Believers as a teen book has dated in the years since its publication so it probably embodies the POP sensibility as well as contributing to the debate about the portrayal of mentally ill superfolk.
I just don't get that five pence on the end. In shops I know the belief is that they have everything end in '9' because you're more likely to wait for your receipt if there's a penny to be had (assuming you don't tell the cashier to just put it in the charity box like most people), but an extra five pence is baffling. Is that five pence their profit from the sale?
I was promised internet shopping was going to make things simpler and now I just feel lied to.
Hello Brigonos:- thank you for your genenerous offer. Long shall we dance the fandango in your honour before the bemused but strangely beguiled hairy creatures of the yard.
ReplyDeleteThe capacity for folks to rip off buyers with just another 5p, 50p,£5.05 and so on amazes me. Those $!*& ers who charge obsene amounts of postage for example, hoping folks will buy their goods without checking the P & P; HELLS TOO GOOD FOR THEM!!!!
Internet shopping has made things simpler for THIEVES, THIEVES, TRAMPS AND THIEVES.
Well, not tramps, obviously, because there's no cheap wi-fi for tramps ...